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| And to think I'm Pro-Choice. |
So I’m driving in a mini-blizzard the other night, and my headlights shine on the following bumper sticker up ahead:
A cartoon-version Virgin cradling Child with a big star behind them. All red and green and gold. And these words: If Mary had been Pro-Choice, Christmas wouldn’t exist.
Holy Mother of God. What? What? Raise your hand if you see the fallacy in that statement. Anyone? Anyone? I get so wound up over crazy, assbackwards thinking like that I could spit stainless steel surgical staplesssssss.
So the driver of that car, who, by the way, was slogging along like a four-hundred-year-old who should have officially retired her license in, like, the late 1600’s at the very fucking latest, BELIEVES that if Mary had been Pro-Choice that she would automatically have aborted her baby? Jesus Christ! What kind of twistfuck is that? You know, Mary might still have wanted to give birth to the Savior of the freaking world if given a choice, AND she may also have had a friend who was knocked up from some Philistine, and she might just have supported that friend’s decision to choose not to have the enemy’s bastard child. Or not. Just sayin’.
And as if that bumper sticker weren’t enough to turn my entire blood supply into a frothy, pink mess, the very next day I almost rear-ended this gem of Christian love and acceptance: TRUE Christians are PRO-LIFE. I actually sped up with the full intention of wiping that stupidity off the rust heap to which it was attached. Fortunately, I have more sense than the pre-tard[1] driving the thing. I don’t want to go to jail, and it sure as hell isn’t worth smashing up my hubby’s Subaru just because some people are dumber than a box of gnu nuts. But, are you fucking kidding me? Who gets to say that I am not a true believer in Christ just because I don’t think abortion should be illegal? I’m not standing on some Mount proclaiming that all preggers should rush to the nearest abortionist to have those unwanted fetii sucked out. Pro-Choice people are not advocating that EVERYONE should have abortions. But that’s exactly what strict Pro-Lifers would have you believe.
The world just is not that BLACK and WHITE. Just because you are Pro-Choice does NOT mean that you are not also Pro-Life. You can fucking be both. Damn. Pro-Choice means that I don’t get to decide what is right for YOU. Or YOU. Or YOU. And, gosh, I even agree with the Pro-Lifers on a tiny part of one of their points: I don’t necessarily want my tax dollars to be spent on abortion-as-birth-control for some drug-addled dumbass who just doesn’t have the energy or brain cells to keep from getting pregnant in the fifth place. But my tax dollars are spent on so much shit I don’t even know about and probably hate anyway. Our government buries untold amounts of crap on which to spend our gazillions in taxes in the tiny print of big bills so that when those pass, our loyal representatives are signing us up to fund unwittingly some guy who took a picture of a dude pissing on a Crucifix in a toilet and called it art. Yeah. Piss Christ it was called. Masterpiece, my ass.
The world just is not that BLACK and WHITE. Just because you are Pro-Choice does NOT mean that you are not also Pro-Life. You can fucking be both. Damn. Pro-Choice means that I don’t get to decide what is right for YOU. Or YOU. Or YOU. And, gosh, I even agree with the Pro-Lifers on a tiny part of one of their points: I don’t necessarily want my tax dollars to be spent on abortion-as-birth-control for some drug-addled dumbass who just doesn’t have the energy or brain cells to keep from getting pregnant in the fifth place. But my tax dollars are spent on so much shit I don’t even know about and probably hate anyway. Our government buries untold amounts of crap on which to spend our gazillions in taxes in the tiny print of big bills so that when those pass, our loyal representatives are signing us up to fund unwittingly some guy who took a picture of a dude pissing on a Crucifix in a toilet and called it art. Yeah. Piss Christ it was called. Masterpiece, my ass.
You don’t see Christ going around judging people. He forgave EVERYBODY. Even the guy who pissed on Him in the john. Okay. I think we can all agree that murder is wrong most of the time except for when it comes to idiots with stupidass bumper stickers, so I get that there has to be some judgment in order to keep the order. But just because I don’t think like you think, or love what you love, or hate races or creeds or sexual orientations you hate, or condemn those you condemn does NOT make me wrong. Or you right. So for Christ’s sake, quit showing your complete and utter lunacy on the tail end of your car.
